when my family would pack up and move every three years, i always looked forward to the new school i would call home. that's right, i had a crush on school. i was bummed in june when the separation started and i was giddy with anticipation come september when i would be reunited with my one true love. i passed the days eagerly completing the workbooks that my mom purchased, and i was baffled every time my sister would fuss about having to complete a page before going outside to play. why would she not want to work in her workbook?! weirdo.
very seldom was i disappointed with my classes, teachers, etc. throughout my public school education. i was pretty much smitten from that first day of half-day kindergarten in charleston, sc. this would also be the first year that i got into trouble at school, but to this day i stand firm in my belief that if the games had been interesting, i would have wanted to play. they were dumb, so i refused.
also, on the chance that you may ever meet my parents and the conversation happens to center around the trouble i got into in school, i'd like the record to show that i refuse to count the tiny episode in preschool involving my shoe taking flight across the room, the next year when my aggression got the best of me and i hit my friend tricia, or 10th grade biology when i refused to dissect the frog and then accidentally spilled the frog supplies onto the floor as i was coming back into the classroom.
let's not get on a tangent though. this post has a purpose and that is to say that i truly believe public school failed me. it has nothing to do with my knowledge of calculus, my exposure to shakespeare, or my "leadership skills" that were honed thanks to student council (which was a class in my high school - admittedly, a joke of a class, but still). while i will forever be able to tell you the meanings of the variables in y=mx+b and name all of our country's presidents, in order, complete with a catchy little tune and an interesting fact about most (thank you, ap us history!), there are simple things that i can't do.
why could i place out of all of my college math courses, yet i have to call my mom every time i read a recipe? it's not because i don't want to learn, but let's be honest - sometimes you can't teach an old dog new tricks. why was i reading the grapes of wrath in ap english when i probably should have been learning about how to keep grapes from rotting in some type of cooking class? case and point: hamburger helper is supposed to be easy. why is mine currently glued to the bottom of my pan? maybe instead of ap this and ap that and college credit this and college credit that, someone should have told me that i was going to have cook for myself and it'd be helpful to know what is under the hood of my car.
i'm sure i learned something useful in high school. maybe it's more important to know how to decorate for prom than it is to successfully balance a checkbook or a cook a meal that doesn't come in a lean cuisine box. maybe reading those morning announcements will come in handy when i run for president and have to make all of those speeches. you also might think all the experiments we did with bunsen burners would help me at the stove, or at least help me to remember to turn off the stove, but so far, no dice.
i eagerly await the day when something i learned in public school proves useful. so far, after all those years in school, four years in college, and two years in graduate school, my money remains on the prom decorating skills.
